Question: what does a Philadelphia-native Republican candidate for PA’s Congressional District 13 do when he’s bored?
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I was browsing ABC News this evening, and I came across this story. One of Philly’s most famous landmarks, Geno’s Steaks, a staple on the campaign trail (Bush, Kerry, Clinton, etc. all stopped there for lunch at one point or another), has put up a sign ordering customers to speak English. Read the article, then watch the video. This guy, Joe Vento, is just plain Philly through and through.

Note to the other guys on the road trip: we’re stopping here for lunch. No questions asked. Pay no attention to the nutritional information about cheesesteaks on the bottom of the screen.

Yeah. Speaking of being busy. I don’t think I actually had a weekend this week. So reading assignments went unread, and listening assignments turned into experiments on the effects of background string quartets on work. (Result: maybe it was just that particular string quartet [Beethoven’s in E minor, op. 59, no. 2] but it’s a bad genre for working.) However, one perk of grad school is that there are no longer quiz grades handed out for reading on time. Which means I can skip the reading assignments until I actually have the cash to buy the books. (Why is it that the cost of textbooks rises proportionally with the cost of education and inversely to the amount of income?)

On the list update side of things, we’ve got an addition to report - Zack Walters, currently sitting out and making money (lots of it, if I read right) has had a site for a while, I just never knew about it. Or something. Anyway, his site, Grounded Reality, reminds me of a Calvin and Hobbes cartoon wherein Calvin, assigned to write a book report on dinosaurs (”All I have to do is write all I know about dinosaurs! For once, I’m guaranteed a good grade!”) builds a thinking cap out of a metal colander. He attaches wires to it, “to keep [his] ideas grounded in reality.” While Hobbes remarks that it’s a little late for that, Calvin proceeds to announce his intention to build a transformer for the Atomic Cerebral Enhance-o-Tron. All that to say - if you look real hard, you’ll find some stuff on Zack’s site that’s grounded in reality.

Finally, what’s with Massachusetts? Why on earth do they keep putting Ted Kennedy in front of the nation? Even most liberal democrats think the man’s off his rocker. I mean, when some of the most liberal papers start complaining about how he’s turning Alito’s hearings into a personal smear campaign for his own enjoyment, there’s a problem. Dave Barry suggests it’s genetic, or perhaps something in the air. A few quotes:

regarding the election of George Washington:

The leading contender in the first presedential election race was George Washington, who waged a campaign based on heavy exposure in media such as coins, stamps, and famous oil paintings. This shrewd strategy carried him to a landslide victory in which he carried every state except Massachusetts, which voted for George McGovern.

regarding the 1972 election:

He [Nixon] got a lot of help from the Democrats, who, continuing the tradition they established in 1968 of appearing to be incapable of operating an electric blanket, let alone the country, nominated George McGovern, who had exhibited a wide-ranging appeal to a broad cross section of nearly fourteen voters. The result was that in the 1972 election Nixon carried all the states and every major planet except Massachusetts.

regarding US Foreign policy in the Reagan era:

Look closely at Central America, and try to imagine what would happen if this vital region were to fall into Communist hands. What would happen is a lot of Communists would be stung repeatedly by vicious tropical insects the size of mature hamsters. We cannot afford to have this happen. We cannot afford to have a horde of Communists down there becoming so cranky and welt-covered that eventually, just for an excuse to get out of the jungle, they foment a revolution in Mexico, which means you’d have Communist guerrilla troops right next to Texas. I doubt if they could take Texas by force. Texas has the largest fleet of armed pickup trucks of any major power, and any invading guerrilla army would be shot and run over repeatedly before it got half a mile, especially if it invaded on a Saturday night. So the Communists would have to use a psychological approach. They’d win the Texans over by such ploys as holding barbecues, wearing big hats and promising to extend the football season. Once Texas went Communist, Oklahoma would follow quickly, followed by Nebraska, followed by whatever state is next to Nebraska, and so on until the entire nation had turned Communist except Massachusetts, which is already very left-wing and consequently would turn Republican.

Ah, well. It’s not a bad state, really…except that around Boston drivers violate not only the traffic laws but also the laws of physics. But that doesn’t speak of their politics. And since I’ve pretty much forgotten why I started saying this, let me sign off now before I write something embarrassing.

I just stumbled across this Non-Sequitur cartoon this afternoon. He has to be talking about Michael Moore.

I’m reasonably sure the cartoonist is left of center (slightly liberal), further proving that pretty much everyone except Moore’s loyal band of brainwashees…er, followers, loves picking on him.